My friend, Rebecca, had her 45th birthday last month. We couldn't go out because she was having such a bad reaction to the chemo that day. We finally made it out today...our mutual friend Ann, picked her up and they met me at the Loft restaurant at Montage, Rebecca's choice of places to meet! She looked great. She is able to wear a wig now and her eyebrows have partially grown back. And although the treatments have turned her teeth brown, she smiled boldly as she saw that we were to sit at a table next to the large window looking out over the beautiful ocean. She hugged me gently and said, "This is exquisite."
Rebecca had a stomach ache last year that wouldn't go away. Yup, it was stomach cancer, and three surgeries later, it is still being found in other places in her body. She is diagnosed 'terminal'...and, she shared today, that the doctors don't even put an amount of time on her-- she should not even be alive. Her "goal" is to live to see her daughter's graduation from college in June. She speaks softly as she shares how much her life has changed in the last year...just last Christmas she was fine! This Christmas she can no longer live on her own, can no longer drive and is doubtful that she will even be around next Christmas.
All that to say...I was encouraged by Rebecca today. She said she enjoys everything MORE now...that she has realized what really matters, that she has made amends with everyone in her life and that she will never be on a diet again!
As she ordered eggs benedict, I decided to put my own diet aside for the morning and enjoy a real breakfast of bacon and eggs and hashbrowns and toast. Ann had a crab and gouda scramble and as we shared bites with one another we absolutlely delighted in the deliciousness of food! We took our time, we looked out over to Catalina, and talked and laughed--and cried-- with each other. We discussed the mystery of the future and how NONE OF US knows how much time we have!
WE ARE ALL TERMINAL!
We walked the grounds and Rebecca remarked on every flower, every tree, and she asked me to take a picture of the ocean and the rocks for her. She loves and appreciates life! It made me realize how much time I spend literally crying over situations that cannot be changed and feeling sorry for myself. I have got to learn to let go of the saddness, look positively to the future and appreciate all the good things I have in my life.
I thanked Rebecca for sharing the time with me, for reminding me of how good life is...and for encouraging me to eat bacon, eggs and hashbrowns again. So darn good!
The simple pleasures of life...and a gentle reminder to simply find that pleasure...while you can.
2 comments:
Sounds like you guys had a great day. It's so great that she has such an amazing outlook on life now. My uncle recently was diagnosed with Lymphoma and is currently undergoing chemo treatments as well. It's scary how cancer can appear so fast without warning. I'll be praying that Rebecca's treatments go well.
That last paragraph. I can tell that you were where I am today.
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