I've been reading, "The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth" by Dr. John C.
Maxwell and THIS jumped off the page for me this morning. I have never
been one to really feel sorry for myself, but OH when I have--I have
This is why.
I thought it might help you, too.
Pity is one of the noblest emotions available to human beings; self-pity is possibly the most ignoble. Pity is the capacity to enter into the pain of another in order to do something about it; self-pity is an incapacity, a crippling emotional disease that severely distorts our perception of reality. Pity discovers the need in others for love and healing and then fashions speech and action that bring strength; self-pity reduces the universe to a personal wound that is displayed as proof of significance. Pity is adrenaline for acts of mercy; self-pity is a narcotic that leaves its addicts wasted and derelict.
Yesterday morning after Dave went down to get us coffee, he came back up and asked if I had spilled something on the floor the night before. I had not. He said the kitchen floor was wet...
We both went down to investigate.
Oh man. It was worse than we thought. Pools of water on the kitchen floor, in the dining room, in the bathroom and the hall. You could SEE water in the walls. (Look under the counter next to Dave in this photo....)
What's amazing is how calm we were.
What's truly incredible is how WELL Dave and I work as a team--effortlessly now.
We both went to work and in the mean time, I made the phone calls, Dave shortened up his day at work and he was home in time to meet the plumber who confirmed it was a slab leak. He capped off a pipe in the bathroom after cutting a 3 foot hole in the wall...and told us someone would follow up this morning.
As weird as today was in our home, the experience of how well we work together was a joy to behold. We knew the 'water damage' company guys were coming around 10 so Dave went to Costco and I stayed home doing laundry and Christmas cards while waiting for them.
Dave came home and we traded places. I ran to the bank and the market while he stayed with the guys, folded laundry and called to let me know that our kitchen would be out of service for a while and that he'd called in a Pick up Stix order for us. I ran in to pick it up then headed home where Dave had set up TV trays and paper plates (and a bottle of wine) for us in the TV room.
I should know this is how life is now, but it truly still amazes me. A team mate who doesn't get mad about the inconveniences of life! A partner who honestly makes life easier and far more enjoyable.
The guys cut open our walls, ripped out baseboards and worked until nearly 6pm while we finished our Christmas cards and watched old movies and actually LAUGHED at the amount of drilling and sawing going on down stairs...!
Once they were (finally) gone Dave posed for the photo above. Yep, smiling and laughing and not knowing how long this will go on. (The blowers have to run until AT LEAST 4pm Monday...)
Instead of being even the slightest bit angry, Dave grabbed the shrimp he'd bought at Costco, a couple of more paper plates and a bottle of water and headed back up to our TV trays.
And put on "It's a Wonderful Life."
We sobbed! You see George? You really have a wonderful life!
We both know--despite all the crazy in our world--how very fortunate we are to have found each other.
I am so very grateful for him and I'm the first to admit that I really do have a wonderful life.
...of course the kitchen is another story.
For the past couple of months, I have been seriously thinking about going back to see my counselor. I have not had an appointment with her over the last couple of years (chalking up the sadness and grief to my mom's death, Dave's dad's death...and menopause...) but lately I have felt like I cannot shake the 'what's it all about, Alfie?'-type feelings.
I emailed my counselor, who is semi-retired now, and she said she could could certainly work me in. The cost? $200/50 minutes. I am sure that's the going rate these days as I paid $150/50 minutes 10 years ago. But still!!
Dave said he had a better idea...Two tickets to Disneyland!
I have to admit, I was a bit reluctant at first (ask Dave about my mood that morning...) but, honestly, the one day admission for two--with a Starbucks and a pumpkin scone!--
came in RIGHT AT $200. For EIGHT hours.
We immediately ran into Mary and Burt. Dave's favorites!
I have to admit...it was just what the doctor ordered.