You're the one I love...

I have been living 'on my own' for well over six years now. Though I endured the first year crawling out of confusion and gradually adjusting to being alone, I thoroughly enjoyed the next few years fixing up my home, thriving in my new job, traveling Europe extensively, spending lots of time reconnecting with old friends and realizing that life would not only go on, but become simply amazing!
So it has really only been over the last couple of years that I have experienced 'dating' of any sort...and, as I have blogged about before, it's been quite the education! Given that my only previous dating experiences were LITERALLY from the last century and included drive-in movies and Ms. Pac Man marathons, it has literally been like starting from scratch. I might as well be 16.
Actually, it's WAY better than dating was at 16. I know (and really like) who I am at this point in life and (I am pretty sure ) I know exactly what I am looking for in a man.
I know that, unlike when I was 16, I don't have to pretend to like NASCAR or soccer (or anything else!) in hopes that he might like me. I don't have time for a bad attitude, drama of any kind, or an inability to pick up the phone (or put it down.) And God help the man who is unkind. I can't handle cruelty, especially when it's dished out as teasing. Not gonna do it.
The BEST part of dating NOW, though, is being able to call and say, "Hello? Yeah, I don't think you're the one. I wish you the best! Good bye." It's actually pretty easy to know when they are NOT the one...well, at least it is when you're dating in your 40s.
How did I know? Here's my list from the last several years of my many first (and last) dates. Enjoy.

When I was cooking dinner for him and he showed up empty handed.
When he said baseball season lasted way too long.
When he came to pick me up wearing a thick gold necklace.
When he left the toilet seat up in my bathroom.
When he stopped me mid sentence and said, "Wait, who's Willie Mays?"
When he said, "Let me call one of my roommates to see if..." (Wait, you're 45 and you have multiple roommates?)
When I told him I had four sisters and he said, "Oh, your poor dad."
When he said he spent most of his free time with his mother. (Oh come on, even if it's true, don't tell me that on a date!)
When he told me that I ate too much. (We're at an all you can eat sushi place for crying out loud. Don't you want me to get your money's worth?!)
When he said, "I don't really listen to music"
When he said he had no desire to see Europe.
When he said his dream was to have a baby--a son to take fishing (MY son is 26 dear...not gonna happen with me. Can I interest you a Porsche instead?)
When he told me (with tears in his eyes) that he was really still in love with his wife, tho they had been separated for almost a year. (I remember I had NO idea what to say!)
When he said he had a home gym and that he would rather run than anything else in the world. (Personally, bub, I can name 10,000 things I would rather do than run.)
When he said he'd never let his kids go to public school. (The Cee lo Green song goes here.)
When he said he had spent the day in court as a character witness for his ex wife who was getting a restraining order against her new boyfriend. (I am NOT kidding!)
When he asked me to loan him money to make rent.
When he told me he had three little dogs. (Or was it three little kids?...either one gives me the chills...)
When he said he had been to Wrigley Field last year, when he was in Boston. (I had no mercy. You can mix up Safeco and Petco and maybe even Citi Field and Bank One, but NOT freaking Wrigley and Fenway.)

If nothing else, it's been entertaining.
Thankfully, I have truly enjoyed the learning and the real living I've done on my own! I must admit though, deep into my seventh single year...I just may be ready for the one to come along.
The real one.
At this point, I actually believe there is someone out there who is waiting just for me, too.
"The one" for me is friendly and REALLY nice and funny and genuinely happy. He's independent, full of energy, and ready for fun and adventure! He wants to go to a baseball game and dance in my kitchen. He will think I'm beautiful (and tell me all the time) and will be unable to keep his hands off of me! He wants to go see the world, eat a lot of good food and hold my hand. And kiss me a lot. (A whole lot.)
He'll be well worth waiting for.
(And he'll know where Wrigley Field is.)

Until then...
I really am enjoying every minute on my own.
And, seriously, it ain't half bad.