Thursday, January 31, 2013

Survive...or THRIVE!

I hate pity. Let me rephrase that...I HATE pity!
More than THAT...I hate people who WANT pity.
If you think that makes me a hard person or a mean person, then you don't know me.
I have very little tolerance for anyone who makes excuses for where they are in life. Or where they aren't.
I don't even like the term "survivor"--though I suppose if you survived the Holocaust or Cancer, that might be the only ones I'll let you have.
You have choices in life and I'm here to tell you that you can survive just about anything.
You can. One thing about goes on.
But the choice is to do more than just survive. That's really the easy part (again, Holocaust and fatal disease aside.) What have you done since you survived?  Are you moving forward? Are you waiting for your ship to come in? Are you taking control of your future...of your life?!
Or...are you just waiting for another person to come along to complain to and to make excuses?
THAT is what I hate.
I don't feel sorry for you. And, I can't tell you how many others feel the same.

Stop your bitching and do something about it.
Your father left you when you were five? Gee, that's too bad. What have you done since?
You lost your job? I just saw a HELP WANTED sign at Target. And Home Depot. And...
Your boyfriend/husband/girlfriend/wife broke up with you? Bummer. That sucks. Wanna go to Italy?

Get it?!
Life goes on my friends
...and you can choose to EXIST...survive...
This is the ONLY life on Earth that you have. THIS IS IT folks!

I was fat MOST of my life.
Made fun of throughout my childhood.
I got pregnant at 18.
I had to drop out of college to work full time and support my family.
I was in a 'less than' happy marriage for 23 years.
In a span of three months I lost my home, my job, my church, my marriage, my car, my neighbors, many friends...
I had to move five times in six years.
I lost my home to foreclosure in 2011.
I lived alone for eight years.
My boyfriend broke up with me.

Here's the deal...
Life went on. And in EVERY one of those situations I had the CHOICE to bitch, moan, cry, LOOK FOR PITY, use it as an excuse to do nothing, feel sorry for myself...
I chose to take EVERY ONE of those circumstances and LEARN from them...and GROW from them!
I LEARNED to control my weight. I think I became a KINDER person because of the ridicule I received as a child. I went back to college and graduated a week after my THIRTY SEVENTH birthday! I raised two AMAZING, hardworking, successful and independent children. I became single and learned to LOVE living alone--at age 42. I bought a new home and don't ever need to move again.  I found a new job--one that seems to be custom-made for me. I have incredible new friends--true, deep, non-judgemental and OH so loving friends.
And, as far as that boyfriend breaking up with me...
I am so grateful for that! He wasn't (even close to!) the one for me.
And now, I am with the (indisputable!) love of my life.
Talk about THRIVING!

Please stop complaining. I promise you, I'm not the only one who doesn't want to hear about it anymore.
Stop making excuses. Again, I have solutions if you're ready to hear them.

Please...put the past behind and look forward to the future with curiosity and excitement!
You can do it. I promise!
Put pity aside...along with regret and disappointment. Stop replaying your past and 'wishing' you'd had a better life.
Start moving in the direction of success and happiness and enjoyment and fulfillment!
Stop just surviving...and start THRIVING!
And start right now.


Mia's Cottage said...

Love it Julie! And you know what really, REALLY gets me.....when they post it all over Facebook... I agree with you 100%!

Kelly said...

You said it Sister!!! XO